DIVA. It took bringing another life into this world to remember the life I was infused with from the beginning. God somehow downloaded this deep, internal knowing inside me. I could do anything with His help. As a child, I walked and spoke with more authority than a child should at times. I wasn’t spoiled or rude. I just had a deep sense of right and wrong. I wanted to learn the truth about the beauty and tragedy I saw in the world. I wanted everyone to know exactly what was on my mind and in my heart. This mindset created an amazing opportunity for me. It sent me to boarding school. Boarding school was a completely new adventure. Custom designed for an ambitious young woman. I remember walking on the grounds of my new home at 14, meeting other kids who would become lifelong friends, and somehow in those first days I got a title…DIVA.
People called me a diva. Me? Diva? I wasn’t exactly sure what other students meant except that I had once seen what people called a diva at the Met in New York City. My father had taken me to the opera when I was 11. We saw Salome.
The opera was like heaven for me. Sweeping steps, men in suits, women in beautiful dresses, and then the music! It was like nothing I had heard before about a topic I didn’t totally understand but I FELT the POWER of the voices. Opera. This art was exhilarating! The Diva was the centerpiece of this creation.
So when people referred to me as a diva, perhaps it was meant to bring me down or mock me as the new girl in town, but I thought “Yes! That is exactly who I am. I have a voice and it is powerful!”
I felt that way about myself.
Then I forgot who I was…